Our Family Budget Report Card

The challenge we set ourselves this month was to try and live on $20 a day. The first of the month we were able to do this remarkably well, and on average we spent only our allotted amount of money. It wasn’t easy and left us all cranky and tired of being so stingy. For the first half of the month - I would give us an A (and I am a tough grader). The second half of the month I wouldn’t want to say that we totally fell off the wagon of our family budget challenge – but we totally fell of the wagon. I can provide all sorts of reasons to rationalize this (unexpected bills, a trip out of town, house guests) but really I have to meet it square in the eye – we get an F for the second half of the month. It doesn’t feel good to publicly declare this – but we have to be honest with ourselves and others – $20 a day just didn’t cut it. All told, our average is a C for the challenge, which technically is passing, but it doesn’t feel like we passed. I look at the lack of savings we have at the end of month and I sigh in annoyance at our balance sheet.  But it’s not all bad. We have learned many things to help us manage our money in the future:

1. Even if we give ourselves more than a $20 a day budget, we need a budget to live by and to follow as closely as possible.

2. We will continue to use cash so that we actually see and feel the amount of money going through our hands each day.

3. We will keep looking at receipts and using coupons, because we saved over $40 this month by doing these two things.

4. We will continue to use cloth bags at the store – in total we received $5 from grocery stores this month for using our own bags.

5. Items that we consume a lot of (milk, yogurt, bread, eggs) we will buy in bulk.

6. We will continue to cut out luxuries (I haven’t bought chocolate the second half of this month to make up for our spending sins).

7. We have to spread out our spending.  If we get an item of clothing or book one pay period we have to wait until the next pay period to get something else.

8. Spending money now doesn’t feel good and we need to preserve that psychology. That might sound strange, but it is true. If we ever want to get ahead, we have got to spend less and save more – that is all there is to it!

How Kids Turn Introverts Into Extroverts

I am not saying that I used to be an introvert, but before I had children I sort of kept to myself. I always thought of myself as friendly and would occasionally say hello to people as I passed, but for the most part I guess I really was a bit of introvert. Boy how kids change that. Yesterday when I was walking around with my son, he happily greeted every single person we passed. He would say “hello” or “hi” or “hi ya” and insisted on repeating his friendly salutation until the person would respond (which sadly enough some did not). As we went into everystore my son continued his chorus of greetings. As we entered the park he ran up to all the kids (and their caregivers) and would continue his mingling and socializing, as if he were hosting some sort of party for all of his new friends, and wanted to put them all at ease. I looked on in amazement and sheer joy at his forthrightness, friendliness, and pure love of other people. In his actions he reminds me that it is okay to smile, wave, and say hello to those we pass or interact with. As he encounters every individual with this same friendliness regardless of their age, race, job, physical appearance, ethnicity, or religion, he reminds me not only to be more open and outgoing than I might be comfortable with, but also to embrace all those around me, no matter who they are or where they come from. Now that’s what I call the kid teaching the mom a lesson!

Why Our Family Budget Challenge Looks More Like A Crash Diet

I have never been one to diet. If my pants feel too snug I know I have to eat less and walk more. I have watched friends struggle with trying to lose weight and many have moaned to me about the horrors of a “crash diet” telling me that it seems like it is destined to fail before it even begins. Well, I sort of know what they mean now. As many of you know our family has been consumed with a budget challenge this month, and we are trying to live on $20 a day. It started well, we got half way through the month and all our pennies were accounted for and we did not go over-budget. Like all good crash diets though, this sort of radical change is difficult to sustain. Since the 15th we have felt disillusioned with our budget challenge, as so many different expenses have come up – putting us way over our $20 dollars a day budget. We have had medical bills, packages to send overseas, a trip out of state, and a good friend’s birthday to try and fit into our budget. And just like a crash dieter that decides to eat the bag of cookies because they just ate the ice cream – we too feel like it is all unravelling a bit.  The upshot is – although we are still on average not spending more than $20 cash a day on ”normal expenses” - we have spent way more money than we thought we were going to and have had to dip into our ear-marked savings to pay for it. That hasn’t felt good. Just like the crash dieter who skips a meal the next day to make up for the previous days over-indulgence, we are now trying to spend even less to help compensate for the other expenses we had.  The problem with crash diets is that they really don’t work for the long term.  So that we don’t “come of the rails” at the end of the month – our family now needs to assess how our budgeting can work in the long run by anticipating expenses, budgeting for them, and by being careful of where and how we spend our money. 

A Darling Toy With a Not So “PC” Name

We recently received a lovely, plush, unique toy from Blue Tulip. It was an immediate hit in our house, as it is multi-functional. It seems to act as a ball, cuddly toy, and punching bag all at the same time. I never really knew what the toy was called, so when I saw it in a store, I went up to the clerk and asked “Excuse me, does this toy have a name?” She laughed “Yes, it is called “Chubby Wubby.” Our toddler was with me during this exchange and since then screams “CHUBBY, CHUBBY, CHUBBY” every time he sees his new found friend. We can’t help cringing in horror that he might say this about anything (or anyone) this shape. We have tried re-branding the toy, “Fuzzy Wuzzy” or “Bubba Bear” – but to no avail. I am sorry to say Chubby Wubby it is and ever shall be. Great toy, maybe not so great a name.

The New Trends in High Chairs

It has been a long time since we walked into a baby store, but we were in search for a new potty for our son (yes, I am sure you will all read about this soon enough). My husband and I stood in amazement at almost all of the products. We couldn’t believe how many of them seemed so “posh” compared to what was available when we had our baby two years ago. The high-chairs are a perfect example of this. The two that stood out as the most unique and apparently “high-tech” are both “award winners.” They were the Stokke Tripp Trapp Chair and the Boon Flair Pedestal Highchair with Pneumatic Lift.Though they both seemed expensive, we reminded ourselves that ours was over $200 and we were never particularly that happy with it. These seemed to be easy to clean, multi-functional, and good space savers.

Mom’s Favorite Banana Bread

Because we are trying to only spend $20 dollars a day, I find myself baking more. I especially find myself wanting to use any, and all, left-over food, especially produce on the brink of going bad. So in my quest to do so, I feel like a “frugal gourmet.”  One recipe that I have now baked twice and has come out remarkably well each time is from the blog Whipped. I googled “best banana bread” and happily found this recipe first time round. It was such a hit that we just made a double batch of it and intend to freeze it (if we have the self-control not to eat it). I only had two bananas instead of the three they suggested, so I put in a handful of blueberries, and it came out delightfully well. We haven’t added nuts yet, but I am sure that we will if we have them in. This recipe was easy, convenient, and incredibly good. Thank you to Whipped, for helping this mom keep to her daily budget in a tasty way!

Desperately Seeking Daycare

Yesterday my heart almost broke when a young woman hesitantly approached me at the park, apologetically asking “I am sorry to bother you, but we just moved to the area, and we are desperately seeking daycare, do you have any suggestions?” I remember those days all too well - when you put your first child into the hands of another and are wracked with the guilt and worry that can often accompany this. Our family was blessed to find two amazing women to help us with our own childcare struggles, but for months after our first child was born we honestly had no idea what to do or who to use (and we regretted how far away we lived from close friends and family).  Before I could even answer this woman, another piped in stating “Oh, this is why people use Craigslist – maybe you could check there.”  Although this might have been good advice, I sensed the young woman’s exasperation when she sighed back “Oh, I guess I didn’t think of that, thanks. Would I be able to find someone I could trust? My daughter has never even had a sitter before.”  I did offer three or four suggestions to the young mother, all based on the good experience my child, or a friends’ child, has had with different daycare centers. But regardless of these leads – I offered her some advice to finding the “right fit.” I told her to make an appointment with several schools, have both parents and the child visit, tour the school and talk to the teachers and staff. Then make sure to observe how your child is interacting with others and others with your child. Do you all feel comfortable? Does the facility seem safe? How many other children are being watched? What are the other childrens’ ages? How would the center contact you in an emergency? What are their safety practices? For more great questions to ask, see the Top 10 Questions to Ask a Prospective Child Care Provider. Otherwise, I think what this young mother was doing was the perfect, and gutsy, first step. Ask around, get opinions, find leads, and most of all make sure you feel that the solution you find (whether it is in house or not) makes you, your child, and the care provider all comfortable.

How Do You Spell Relief? C-O-S-T-C-O

I have a confession to make – I have never been a huge fan of Costco. It always seems too busy, too big, and too overwhelming. I have also felt that you tend to walk out with more than you really need and impulse more than you really should. One of the things we wanted to do in the second half of our family budget challenge, was get ahead on some of the basics, spending more money upfront, leaving us with less to get by on for the rest of the month. Our solution: a trip to dreaded Costco. Boy, how things change when you are trying to save money. This week we went to Costco to stock up on some basics, and I kept lingering on every aisle saying aloud to my husband “Do you know how much this is in the grocery store?” Now I am sure that you don’t win on all items at Costco, but I felt we really did. We bought a half pound of yeast for $3.59 (two small sachets cost me $1 and only made one loaf of bread). We bought six boxes of penne pasta for $6.00 when one was costing me $1.76 for the same box in the grocery store. We bought cleaning items as well as the basics of milk, eggs, yogurt, and cheese and figured out that on each item we were saving up to a third or half the price we had previously paid elsewhere. We realized we were in risk of what many do at superstores like this one – buy too much because “it is cheaper.” So you have to use common sense when shopping in such places:

• Make a list before you walk in.
• Don’t impulse. If you see something you want that is not on your list, make note of it and put it on your list for a future shop.
• Make sure you have the room for what you are buying in bulk (if the milk goes bad because you don’t have room for three gallons what was the point of buying it?)
• Make sure you can finish the item. Although the avocados were cheaper we would have to use ten of them in the week – a bit of stretch for us.
• Don’t make it a habit to shop in these sort of places more than once a week (as over time you might spend more not less).
• Make sure you can get there often enough to make it worth the membership cost. If not, don’t join.

We walked out having spent more than half of what we had for the rest of the month, and we think realistically that we will have to “borrow” from savings to get by this month. But we did notice that since our shop on the 15th, we haven’t had to go grocery shopping once, and we are creatively using all the items we have in. So once again, we will keep you posted on our budget challenge – but more lessons are being learned every day!